Not a night I expected

So at 00:06 on Firday morning, there I am in bed with the laptop chatting away to Mr. Kewley. I suddenly realised that Friday 29th woulda been our 2month. :(

You know the feeling in your stomach just before you break down. It came as sudden as the realisation of the significance of that day. not fun.

Kept it all in, and continued with Dan, he knew something was up - told him i was just getting tired and that i just needed some sleep. Soon after I signed off and slept. Not a comfortable night's sleep.

LOL, but what did cheer me up was a pretty good day at work, Ian, my manager worked with me solid with the project i was based on and we did quite well - though not enough for me NOT to have to go in this weekend. BOTH DAYS

meh. On my way out of work at about quarter to 6, i noticed a missed call and a text. It was Roya. A stunning Iranian girl who I had met in St. Albans a number of times, but had only loosely been introduced. :) She had wanted to do something and called me up. I said I hardly knew her and that i thought it'd be great! (wierd I know)

To cut a long story short, I spent what would have been my 2month with my ex - with the mother of my future kids. And thats certainly no lie. Some real mixed feelings about all that......still such is life. You take whats dealt to you, but when you try and hold on to those cards, you're girlfriend finds she's simply too busy to put you in her life.

Shame that. I still miss u babe. xxx

Slowly, slowly

:|

At work waiting for a unit to chill to 0°C. Accidently left a flap open on the HALT chamber and it started releasing 100% nitrogen gas into the room.

he he he

ooops. hey, I'm an intern we make mistakes!

so ya. sent Kate an e-mail last night. wanted to make sure she knew i was still thinking about her. at times i envy how busy she is, she wouldnt have the time to think about it all. but then i realise that it was her lack of time that made us slowly drift apart. :(

anyway, kewers sent me mail today, really put me in a very good mood. this USA trip should be a laugh.....honestly cannot wait! he's already told the girls that im now single and has organised some kinda thing with the cheerleading squad for the Football team! have to admit, i am feeling quite reserved in that sense.

running short on time, so il leave you with this thought. SFP failures have nothing to do with the Ambient conditions, but in my case with the x4 1Gb 850nm NetCom SMB 2000.

FireArse

It was great while it lasted :(

So it happened.

Had the talk. My fears soon surfaced.

I always knew she barely had the time to study, let alone have a boyfriend. Her rowing (in a boat) meant more to her than her studies. Her 'Bops' (Cambridge Nites out) meant more to her than everything else.

Another relationship always came to mind whenever I saw or met Kate. That broke down because one of the couple simply didnt have the time for the partner and the relationship. It applied here too. It gave me a thicker skin, and deep down I knew from my first Cambridge visit.

Was I a part of her life? Hell no. Did I want to be? Absolutely, more than anything else.

I asked her while she was lying in bed whether she still wanted the relationship.

She said yes, but as soon as there was a second of hesitation, I knew. I decided to go. 2 of her friends came in and were chatting. I could see it in her face she was hurting. I put a mask on and tried to act fine. I hadn't met them before, so i thought they wouldnt be able to figure out i wasn't 'right'

dont think Kate nor i convinced them

soon after they left, i left. both of us upset. wasn't any point in staying any longer. was there?

God i miss you babe. why do i do this to myself? Will I see you again? yes. Would there be any chance of it being like before? I think that one's for you to decide.

I sure as hell know how to pick 'em, eh?

3Com nights out

Hey-hey!

Went out last nite, (good old Batch does it again!) Had a fantastic time!! I'm sure i was suffering from withdrawall symptoms from not going out....

Casa, dead. The Bell, idiots singing badly. The Vintry, full of attitude. Shoulda just gone into The CrossKeys instead.....

Batch started off dead. But at about half ten, it picked up outta nowhere!! The 3Com guys were lashed. It was great! Good company, good atmosphere, but lacking one thing, the Girlfriend.

What can ya do? Plan to see her a number of times before i go to the States, so we're making up for that :)

This weekend should prove pretty interesting..... :)

il post sometime soon...

x

Never knew food was that good....

So there I am, sitting at my desk. With thoughts of everything apart from work going through my head.

Why? Because the hunger had taken over my thought process from 11AM. What a bitch. Normally, after 4/5 days of Fasting, the body understands whats going on and gets used to not eating. The metabolic rate seems to slow (for me anyway) and my usual life caries on. But oh no, not this year.....I'm easily agitated and I get all moody at times.

This doesn't help cos I get moody for the tiniest of reasons of late. But eh.

So my hunger hasn't sorted itself out yet. Hope it does within the next few days. This is getting rediculous. The throat is promising to make a swelling comeback....not promising for my trip to the States....I WILL be fine for that trip. I will go to the States with all sorts of Anti-biotics and pain relief....

The excitement of this trip is wiping me out already.

Dan told me about the possible things he has up his sleeve for his trip. Night-flights over cities, hiring cars for road-trips & watching the sun set over the Grand Canyon. Isn't that enough to make anyone melt? And I'm going in less that 20days. :)

(Did i forget Vegas?!) :)

I loved Ben's reaction; "Why is it the non-drinking, non-gambling Muslim gets to go to Vegas DURING RAMADAN and i have to sit here in Leciester and do my final year?!"

I quite like that dude :)

Looking forward to seeing KAte on Saturday. At least i think it was Saturday, will have to check with her when if I get the time tomorrow.

Guess thats enough for now. Just found out how to post pics on these blogs, so beware!

Firas

The first step

So, hey.

I'm new to this thing. Not sure what it about axactly, have a few rough ideas. Trying this first post to see what happens really.

So its like an online diary then huh? Well, I'm looking forward to seeing my Bro again, he's hopefully coming back from uni today for a visit :)

What else is on my mind......my girlfriend, Kate :)

The building work @home is quite annoying, but eh :(

and this Blogging thing...... :)

BFN